Artemis Fowl the Third
by Yami Maniac
Summary: What if there was an Artemis Fowl the Third and this Artemis was female? And, uh oh, she plans on monopolising Haven...
1. Meet Hunter Quartz

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

_What if there was an Artemis Fowl the Third…and this Artemis was female?_

_Answer: perfect disaster!_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Artemis Fowl the First or the Second but the Third is definitely mine. **_

yamimaniacyamimaniac

"Who are you?" Crimson met ice blue. 22-year old Artemis Fowl the Second suppressed a shudder. Artemis was facing a young 5-year old girl with raven-black hair who claimed she was called Hunter Quartz. He could feel a foreboding sense of mild danger. Beside him, Butler shifted his weight uneasily. Artemis had learnt to trust Butler's intuition. If Butler felt something was not right, something was not right. Hunter Quartz was more than met the eye.

"I could ask you the same question," said the 5-year old, guarded red eyes flickering from Butler's size to the nearest exit.

"I am Artemis Fowl."

"That tells me nothing."

"Who are you, then?"

"Hunter Quartz."

"That tells me equally nothing, now doesn't it?"

"I suppose," she replied a bit disdainfully, ignoring the matron's frantic warnings and attempts to interrupt the conversation.

"Ah, please excuse her. She is very unsociable and disrespectful even at best," the flustered matron said. "But pure talent, the girl has. She's a child prodigy. You saw her work just now."

"That is the reason why I am speaking to her now," Artemis said with a growing sense of irritation. There was practically no topic to the conversation, much less the one he intended to pursue. "Please elaborate on the painting in the hall."

Pause, and then, "What?"

"Tell me about your painting of the fairy."

"What about it?"

"Why did you do it?"

"I find supernatural objects fascinating. Therefore, I decide to make them the subject of my artwork." Simple as that?

One eyebrow reached his hairline. A very large display of emotion from the usual stoic character. Obviously, the stunning vocabulary from the girl had left quite an impression. Silently, he wondered if this is effect that he, himself, used to have on people. Butler was having silent fits of laughter behind him. Apparently, yes.

"Can I go now, sir," she stressed 'sir' in a manner that held no respect.

Artemis felt insulted but only nodded his head. He signaled that it was time for them to take their leave. Only when they were well out of the door did it strike Artemis that he never did ask the girl whether or not she believed in fairies. In the car, he asked Butler his opinion on Hunter Quartz. Chuckling, his friend replied, "Well, Master Artemis, she reminds me a lot of you." Artemis could only stare in shock.

"Excuse me?" he spluttered in a much undignified manner.

"My apologies, Master Artemis. I have apparently said too much."

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Back at the Fowl Mansion, Artemis restrained himself from hitting the multi-million dollar computer. He knew that it wouldn't help. It seemed that the Quartz family didn't even exist. Oh, he found the website alright. He just couldn't get in. No matter how many times he tried. He would have bet that even Foaly could not access the site. He hit the keyboard with a fist. The screen beeped.

"Password:7. Accepted. Please browse the site at your leisure," a cool recorded voice said.

Artemis reeled from shock as the realization that the password he could not guess was a single digit number hit him. After recovering, he browsed the site only to be disappointed. The information he gathered was far too general to be of any use. He would have to have another talk with Quartz.

flashback

"_Master Artemis, I think this may interest you."_

"_An art exhibition? Now why would I wish to see that?"_

"_Have a closer look Master Artemis."_

"_Is that what I think it is, Butler?"_

"_If you are thinking that a young child painted what looks like an elf who looks remarkably like Miss Short sitting on the far east balcony of the Fowl Mansion talking to a boy of your likeness, then, yes, I believe it is."_

"_Do you think the artist knows of the People?"_

"_We cannot be sure. If yes, then the child must be a genius to portray it as such."_

"_The exhibition ends at three. If we leave immediately, we shall arrive in time to evaluate whether or not the painting is authentic."_

"_Very well Master Artemis."_

end flashback

He would need another talk with the mysteriously infuriating young Quartz. It would have to wait till the next day.

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Hunter Quartz was woken up early by that highly irritating matron. She meant well but even a coin can tip the dragon's hoard. Hunter chuckled inwardly. Old habits break hard, especially if you've had them as long as you lived. Her speech mannerisms and phrases left many puzzled. She yawned and slowly dragged herself downstairs. On the last step, the one which made an awful creaking noise, she miscalculated the distance and overstepped it. She never did hit the floor. Someone had caught her just in time. She twisted round to see Artemis Fowl the Second standing there. He let go of her.

"Nice day," he said, as if nothing happened.

"Red sky at set, Sheepers not wet (1)," Hunter agreed.

An eyebrow was raised. "Pardon?"

Hunter rolled her eyes. "Birds are for Featherers (1)," she mumbled, making a beeline for the door. It was blocked by Butler.

"Master Artemis asked you a question."

"When tigerpards(1) eat kittypet(2) mush!" she snapped back.

"'Sheepers', 'Featherers', 'Tigerpards', 'Kittypet'?" Artemis echoed.

"What do you want from me?" Hunter growled.

"Simple. A logical and reasonable answer."

Hunter spat something which sounded abusive.

"What does that mean?"

"Translated it means: Make like a dinosaur and eat clay."

"Is it even possible to have a decent conversation with the likes of you?"

"Yes."

"You start."

"Do you believe in fairies?"

Hunter just laughed. "Do centaurs eat carrots?"

"Yes, they do."

"Congratulations, genius."

"You are a strange one."

"Same for you, Hunter Fowl."

"Hunter is your name."

"And yours as well. Unless, of course, you really do practice archery."

"It's a female name, by the way," Hunter added as an afterthought.

... "It can be used for either gender."

"It doesn't concern me. I thought you might want to have it changed."

"How did this topic stray so far from the point?"

"You let it. I'm going now," Hunter took a running stride and jumped out of the window.

The matron ran to the window. "You need not have surprised the guests with your circus tricks, young lady! This is the second floor!" she shouted out the window.

A voice floated up. "So what!"

"Please excuse her. Quite a regular little mountain goat she is, sirs." The matron apologized to Artemis and Butler.

Artemis did not doubt the statement. Hunter did not sound the least bit hurt. Or human, for that matter. A challenge.

Artemis Fowl the Second never backed down from any challenge.

"I would like to file for an adoption immediately."

"For Hunter Quartz?"

"No. For Artemis Fowl the Third."

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"What! Who is going to adopt me!" Hunter was having a bad day. This just made her life worse.

"Oh, you know... the nice man who came to talk to you earlier."

Oh, no. No, no, no, no, NO! THIS IS THE WORST, WORST, WORST! Why me! Hunter was crying in her head.

The matron seemed to have heard Hunter's thoughts. "Now young un. You should be grateful that someone wants to give a good home to a monkey like you. Dress up nicely like a good little girl. He will be here shortly." The matron said patronizingly as she took out a cute little dress.

"I REFUSE TO PUT THAT HIDEOUS CREATION OF YOURS ON AS LONG AS I LIVE!" Hunter screamed.

"Don't you throw a fit now you little goat," scolded the matron.

"A second ago I was a monkey," Hunter retorted.

"Hunter Quartz! You are not to behave like this!"

A cool voice interrupted the squabble. "Amusing as this is, it must stop now. Matron, you seem to have forgotten the girl's name already."

"What's wrong with my name?" Hunter demanded. She was extremely suspicious of the dark-haired man standing in the door way.

"Just a minor adjustment. It was changed."

"To..?"

"Artemis Fowl."

Hunter, now called Artemis, started saying/ranting words which should not be in her vocabulary until the age of 18, minimum.

Just behind the newly appointed foster 'father', Butler was shaking his head, amused smile on his lips.

Life at the Fowl Mansion just got a lot more interesting.

yamimaniacyamimaniac

From the Claidi Journals. If you read, you will know.

From Warriors... It means 'housecat'

_Like it? Hate it? Tell me! Press the little purple-blue button that says 'go' to review!_


	2. The Hunter incident

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

_**The Hunter Incident**_

_YM: Thank you dear reviewers. I appreciate your comments. They're what keep this story going! However, if your name is Linwen, read the words in **bold italics.**_

**_Oh, yes. You cowardly didn't sign your review so I'll reply publicly._**

"**_The idea is interesting. Artemis adopting a rebel child genius with supposed_**

_**knowledge of the People gives an enormous room to new ideas, plot twists and**_

_**situations varying from the trivial to earth-shattering ones. However, it is**_

_**clear that you haven't thought about writing seriously, probably for lack of**_

_**influences or for sheer laziness. Let me point out several things about your**_

**_fic":-- well lookie here: In case you missed the pointers lying in every direction—I turned TWELVE YESTERDAY! And have YOU thought about the fact that I AM STUDYING FOR A MAJOR EXAM! I said so in CAPITALS, BOLD, ITALICS AND UNDERLINED in my profile. I am WRITING FANFICTION BECAUSE I NEED A BREAK!_** **_And I am the description of LAZY (my name should be under that word in the dictionary); I'll say it here in front of everybody! Besides that, this fanfic is for my BEST FRIEND, not for people who are interested in beautiful writing!_**

"_**- The dialogues are good, but some lack the action descriptions that are**_

**_esential to know the characters better."- I'm laughing at you right now. HAHAH! You're the one flaming AND you spell essential WRONG so ha-ha! Okay, let's put that formally._**

**_Yami Maniac stared at the computer screen with a look of disbelieve which slowly became fits of laughter. Gasping, she pointed at the screen. "The reviewer is soooooooo—there isn't even a word for it!" She succumbed to another fit of hysterical laughter and fell off her chair._**

_**Happy now baka? Now you know what I'm like.**_

"_**- Artemis and Butler seem mischaracterised. It is not plausible that a**_

_**five-year-old would surprise Artemis with her grasp of logics, since he's a**_

_**genius himselfl; it looks false and pretentious. And in the subject of Butler,**_

_**they have always being as close as brothers, and therefore, Arty's reply to**_

_**Dom's remark that Hunter reminds him of young Artemis is exaggerated, making**_

**_Dom's fearful humbleness false as well."-- pretends to look confused what is 'himselfl'? It's not in the dictionary I have here. Besides, there is something we call the UNEXPECETED here in MY COUNTRY, I'm sure yours does too, if not, you could try looking in the book WE call the DICTIONARY. AND, Artemis 2 is already irritated! There is PHRASE WE HAVE OVER HERE; IT'S CALLED STATE OF EXTREME SHOCK. IT'S A MIRACLE ARTEMIS REPLIED. AND BUTLER WAS SORT OF KIDDING! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU! HE WAS FREAKING LAUGHING WHEN HE SAID THAT! NOT AS IN HEHE DID I DO SOMETHING WRONG LAUGHING BUT HAHAHA YOUR REACTION IS KILLING ME LAUGHING!_**

"_**-Your OC sounds a lot like a hormonal teenager than a five-year-old. At the age**_

_**of five, even with a higher intellect, some innocence towards the world remains,**_

_**and a child genius is more prone to examine the world and its interactions with**_

**_curiousity rather than anger."— IM 'CURIOUS' HOW YOU SPELT 'CURIOSITY' WRONG! EVER THOUGHT MAYBE I HAVE A REASON FOR THAT! SHE'S NON-INNOCENT FOR A REASON!_**

"_**- Your format leaves something to be desired. Take a book, flip some pages over**_

_**and check out how are capitals, italics, bolds, punctuation, etc. used, to give**_

_**you an idea. Additionally, you can put your text into a word processor, such as**_

_**Microsoft Word to make a quick, though not-completely-reliable, spellcheck, I'm**_

**_sure it'll pick some stuff."— Hypocrite! HYPOCRITE! IM GLAD TO KNOW MY MULTI-PARAGRAPH RANT IS PROBABLY MAKING YOU WHRITHE IN PAIN! WHY DON'T YOU DO THE WORLD A FAVOUR AND THROW YOURSELF OFF A CLIFF!_**

"_**- "From the Claidi Journals. If you read, you will know."**_

_**What if one 'hasn't read'? It is not a good idea to exclude a portion (or maybe**_

_**all) of your readers by telling them that they can't understand your work if**_

_**they don't go an extra step to learn what you know. A good story doesn't need to**_

_**rely on external sources at all to be understood, and if it does, you should not**_

**_expect a massive response."—I SAID IT ONCE, AND I'LL SAY IT AGAIN! THIS FIC WAS MADE FOR MY BEST FRIEND BUT WAS POSTED FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHO ARE HARDER TO CONTACT. SHE HAS READ THE CLAIDI JOURNALS! I LENT IT TO HER MYSELF!_**

"_**-All that out of the way, I congratulate you on the idea. It's a very good one,**_

_**and if you're seriously interested in writing, you could make something really**_

**_good with it." Okay, THIS was the bit that totally pissed me off. You critique me, AND THEN you PRAISE ME! That's the equivalent of my saying "Oh, and thanks for the review. I appreciate the constructive criticism." After this rant. I DON'T appreciate criticism of any kind._**

_**Learn it and deal with it.**_

"_**If you're seriously interested with writing"…honestly. Cut. The. Crap.**_

_Sorry to all my other readers._

Disclaimer: The Quartz family, Hunter aka Artemis III, and the idea are MINE, anything else is Eion Colfer's.

_Today, Artemis III turns ten. How much does Artemis II suffer? How much does Artemis III's Butler bodyguard, Julian, suffer? Read on!_

yamimaniacyamimaniac

Deep crimson pools stared back at her, fire burning in their mysterious depths.

"Today, I turn ten," she whipped round, glancing at her reflection a last time. Blood red leather trench coat, check. Waist-length ebony hair in a ponytail, check. Black leather shirt and pants, check.

Now, just for the last and most despised touch.

Colored contact lenses.

"Lies," Artemis hissed as she put them on. Perfection was not acceptable in this world and yet imperfection was not an option. Again, the mirror portrayed her image perfectly.

Instead of the surreal being she appeared as when purely herself, she looked merely beautifully mortal. Black betrayed no emotion…unlike the fire that was herself. August 31, the day a civilization will bow down and stare in wonder.

She grabbed her sling bag. The truth shall be known today. I swear it upon myself.

Behind shades of night, the spark of fire danced.

yamimaniacyamimaniac

"Artemis!"

She turned with otherworldly grace.

"What is it Julian? I refuse to tarnish my flawless record for anybody." She flicked a stray strand of hair out of her face arrogantly.

"_Please_ tell me you're _not_ running to school today," Julian didn't even bother correcting her on his name.

"Hm… I suppose it is rather unseemly to arrive in an everyday fashion on such a day," she said disdainfully.

"That's not what I meant exac-"

"Julian."

"…I'll get the car."

"Thank you Julian."

"_Last_ name please! If you've forgotten, it's _Butler,_" he said.

"Hn."

"You'll be the death of me one of these days."

Artemis acknowledged this with a slight inclination of her head. She reached for her bag, as good as telling him that the conversation was over.

Julian Butler sighed and headed for the garage. On the way he thought he heard something. He dismissed it as something not worth noticing. He was wrong.

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"He's only seven years older than me, the silly. I don't understand him… oh, never mind." Artemis went through the performance to be in her mind. "Teacher's day my Ra," she huffed. She closed her eyes. Memories flooded her mind.

/flashback/

Cypress green eyes flickered open, dazed. They met curious crimson orbs.

"Who are you?"

"Holly," the mouth answered.

The girl…so young…seemed to posses wisdom far beyond her years.

"Are…are you an elf?"

"Yes."

"You're pretty."

"Thank you."

"Tell me. Do fairies exist?"

"Yes."

Fire burned in the pools of blood. Pointed fangs were exposed as the pale lips were drawn back in a smirk.

"Thank you, Holly."

Brown eyelids covered the green eyes.

/end flashback/

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The sound of a car approaching jerked her from her thoughts. She hissed but got into it.

"We will be there in five minutes or I see no point in taking the car," Artemis said without looking up.

Grumbling, Julian stepped on the accelerator.

(5 and a half minutes later)

Artemis walked into the hallway where she was pulled aside by the school bimbo, Tea.

"What do you think you're doing showing up so early with your _boyfriend_ in some shiny new expensive car?" she said.

"If you have nothing to say, don't waste my time. Some of us have rehearsals to go to as _some_ of us actually have a major part in the performance. Have a nice day." She turned to go.

"Where do you think you're going Fowl?"

A spark ignited in the dark eyes.

The brunette was sent flying and all you could see was a very rigid Artemis standing there twitching.

"Hey! Vampire queen, what did you do to the pitiful mortal?" Someone teased. The dark head turned and singled out one from the crowd.

"Shut your mouth. She got what she deserved. What you will get if you ignore the _three-foot rule_," she stressed the last part. People parted even though the halls were packed to give Artemis the three-foot radius of space that she needed.

"Thank you." She swept down the hall. They milled like water around her, not daring to penetrate the three-foot radius. They were practically climbing on top of each other to get out of her way.

"ARTEMIS! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN! THE FINAL REHEARSAL WILL START IN TWO SECONDS!"

"Take a breather, jackass. You need one. I'm here aren't I?"

She walked into the room as calmly as she could muster.

Breathe calmly Artemis, breathe girl. Her pulse rate was rising very fast.

"ARTEMIS! ON STAGE NOW!"

There was a soft thud as the offending person slumped onto the floor. Artemis tossed her head and undid her hair.

"There goes the next contestant…" she sang softly, eyes glinting evilly.

"Now, please give a hand for our performers who worked hard to put this musical together." That was her cue.

She pulled on her half-gloves. She walked on stage with an arrogant slant in her stride.

Cue the hair flip. She ditched the trench coat on stage. Did it matter? She was the 'bad guy'.

A thief. A mastermind.

A vampire.

And she played the part perfectly.

Perfection….was now an option. For one being.

yamimaniacyamimaniac

"You know, I don't see the point of having a trench coat if you don't wear it for longer than ten minutes." Julian shook his head as he climbed into the driver's seat.

"It has pockets, Julian. Pockets for sugar stashes."

Julian's eyes bugged. He fell out of the car trying to climb out backwards.

"YOU! DON'T-"

"Calm down. I haven't had sugar for half a year."

"You" Julian panted. "-and your games."

"If you don't drive now, I WILL show you how S-U-G-A-R spells doom again."

Julian drove. He drove very fast.

yamimaniacyamimaniac

Later at the Fowl Mansion…

Artemis knocked on her father's study room door. "May I come in father?"

Artemis II looked into his drawer. He still had some spare…

"Yes. Just wait for me to unlock the-"

"Sorry father. I let myself in again, didn't I?" Artemis III said. Artemis II groaned.

"Where exactly did you learn to do that again? Honestly, nothing is safe from you."

Artemis III pretended to look hurt. "Father! How could you say such a thing! My feelings are delicate in this period of growth. Besides, you said it yourself. 'Cute and Young does not equal Harmless'."

"I am not going to let you go into your circular monologues again." Artemis II retorted. "I still want to know where you learnt to open doors like that."

Artemis opened her mouth to say something then thought better of it.

"It's a secret _Father,"_ she said, eyes half-closed. She had a predatory bored look; rather like a well-fed lion looking at a herd of zebra. "Do you have a meeting today?"

Artemis II turned back to the computer screen. He checked. "Any particular reason you're asking?"

"I can't go with you if there is."

"Elaborate on that." Artemis II looked suspicious.

"I'm busy."

Then the ten-year-old leaned against the wall. "I was bored so I scheduled something with a friend. I thought you might appreciate the notice. Apparently not."

She left.

Butler looked on in amusement. "Really something, hm?"

"She's nothing but a headache." Artemis II said firmly.

"That's why you've got ten bottles of aspirin in your drawer."

Artemis coughed. "Yes?"

Butler took a bottle. "You printed instructions?"

Artemis sighed. "Yes."

Butler read the label aloud.

"_If Artemis knocks on the door-1_

_If Artemis says I'm bored-2_

_If Artemis asks if she can go shopping-3_

_If Artemis says she's going to buy a manga or anime series-4_

_If Artemis tries to cook something-5_

_If Artemis draws something-6_

_If Artemis says "erm…"-7_

_If Artemis goes on a circular rant-8_

_If Artemis comes back with a 'teacher's note'-13_

_If Artemis invents something-half bottle_

_If Artemis goes on sugar high-whatever there is in the drawer?"_

Butler shook his head as he placed the bottle on the table.

"Just shows you how much of an effect she has had on all of us, hm?"

yamimaniacyamimaniac

Artemis III finished packing a small sling bag.

Holly stared at her with blank green eyes while a draconic robot the size of a printer sat on Artemis' desk, chirruping and whirring away.

"Maybe I should have told him the truth. After all, he is one of the few genii scattered on this earth…" Artemis' canines raked her bottom lip in frustration.

"Bad habit," whirred the robot. Artemis stopped immediately.

"Thanks Dragracer. I really should stop doing that." She grinned evilly.

"You lie every time you say that." Holly commented.

Artemis III threw back her head and laughed. "Let's go!"

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Foaly was in the Section 8 headquarters busy monitoring the assignment. Things had become busy after Opal escaped from prison. He hardly got to go out each night to jog with- his thoughts were inturruped as he heard something swish behind him. He turned.

"So much paranoia in one place? What a waste of your budget."

Foaly reared in panic. The visitor's brown eyes gleamed in amusement. She stretched confidently.

"A bit pudgy there, pony boy. Better watch the diet."

Foaly whinnied indignantly. Who was this person who dared enter his workspace and insult him? How did she dare, or more importantly, how did she?

"You don't know me? Let me give you a hint. My first name starts with a vowel, the second doesn't and my family is famous." The female laughed and shook back glossy raven hair.

"Opal Koboi," the centaur whispered.

yamimaniacyamimaniac

_YM: Oo, Opal escaped! MUAHAHAHA! If you don't like, don't review but if you like it, go click the little button and don't be shy to say something even if it is only one word as long as it is nice!_


	3. Scenario

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

_**Random filler chapter with no point whatsoever**_

_**Disclaimer: **I do not own anyone in this story except Hunter, the Quartz clan, Julian Butler and other assorted OC's which I am far too lazy to individually list. I also do not own Teletubbies. And I don't think I own ToysRus OR Elmo._

_YM: I'm tired of people telling me off for my "childishness" and whatnot. To all my buddies, Congratulations! We have made it through the dreaded PSLE together! Patience, Patience, go, go, go! We totally rock! Whooo!_

_Bwahahahahahahaha-cough, hem._

**Part one—Nicknames…**

_(Artemis(Hunter) is six)_

"Mr. Artemis, why does Mrs. Fowl insist on calling the family weird names? It's…pointless and annoying. For you I can understand and her husband, but me? And that Butler boy? By the Kingdoms, she called him 'JU-JU'. That can't be normal. And then Miss Juliet picked it up and now he's got a grand total of 43 nicknames! JU-JU, Ju-boy, Lee, Lien, Jubie, Juan, La-la …personally, I like the La-la one, it reminds me of that ridiculous kindergartener show…Teletubbies or something like that." Artemis paused to breathe, un-natural red eyes half-closed and lips slightly parted in a malignant smirk.

The blue-eyed Artemis II never looked away from the computer screen. "What's yours?" he asked, still staring at the monitor.

"Emi," Artemis grumbled. 'Arty' swung round on his swivel chair and stared.

"Emi? My mother nicknamed you 'Emi'? You must be lying." Artemis said flatly, turning his attention back to his beloved computer.

"Not Emi, E-M-I," Artemis growled, storming out of the room.

**Part 2—My greatest fear is…**

(Artemis III is 10)

_Artemis Fowl the Third a.k.a. Hunter Quartz _– interview

"I have three 'fears' and if you ever tell a single soul I will hunt you down, torture you in every possible way known to humanity and more and kill you in the most painful and slow way ever. Plus the fact that everybody who knows ends up laughing at me. Perhaps you should do Julian first."

_Artemis III interview is interrupted because the authoress doesn't want to risk her neck._

_Julian Butler_—interview

"My greatest fear? Why do you need to know?" (He'll need a _bit_ of persuasion… hang on a sec.) "Um, okay. My greatest fear…well, I have two. The first is Artemis on sugar high. Mostly this applies only to the girl one but even _you_ got to admit Mister Artemis on sugar high is a horrifying thought. The second one…don't laugh, okay? It's exploding teeth. May I go now?"

(Okay…gaspshockhorror a Butler afraid of _exploding **teeth!**_ You have a right to go into a continuous state of shock. Okay, let's get back to Artemis.)

_Artemis fowl III interview continues_

"I'm not ready swears violently! Get lost!" (Authoress must leave this for a while because she doesn't fancy getting hit by one of the assorted items flying out from Artemis' room.)

_Half an hour later_

"Okay, I'm scared of squeaky toys, lacy things and people pinching my cheeks and squealing "Sooooo cuuuuuutttttte!" Will you leave me alone now? If not you can meet a treasured possession of mine…it's shiny, sharp and dangerous. No prizes for guessing right, though."

**Part 3, **_specially dedicated to XBellZBunneh, Swatter and Nightmareshauntme_**—No sense of direction whatsoever**

"You got lost in your own _school_? How is that possible, even for a freak like yourself?!" Julian asked, shocked.

"My sense of direction is really messed up. When I first came, I got lost in the part of the Manor where I have now learnt the evil kitchen appliances, I swear on my life they're cursed, reside and got lost there for two days before your uncle found me. Then, there was the time my class went for an excursion to the Zoological Gardens," ("You mean the Zoo," Julian interrupted.) "and I took **one** wrong turn and came back two hours late after asking for directions _twenty_ times." Artemis listed, eyes half-closed while attempting to remember what other incidents had happened.

"Okay, I get your point," Julian said.

"I'm not done yet! I got lost in ToysRus once," ("You got lost **_where?!_**" Julian shouted.) "in the Elmo section. I was stuck there until my friends found and rescued me." She took another breath, ready to continue.

"Okay! STOP!" Julian screamed and ran.

Artemis blinked. "I didn't even tell him about that time that I got lost in the indoor playground or the ball pool." She said to herself.

Dragracer beeped. "You shouldn't talk to yourself. People will wonder," it said.

yamimaniacyamimaniac

_Okay, this is the first time I did something like this so REVIEW and tell me if I should do somemore!_


	4. Opal or Quartz

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

_**Opal or Quartz**_

_YM: Belated Happy 2007, Happy CNY in advance and Good luck for your years in Sec. school! Dedicated to 6 Patience 2006, ALL 42+1(Theo, even if you only were a temp. student, you're still one of us!) Love you all!_

yamimaniacyamimaniac

Captain Holly Short was having a lousy day. Her partner, the infamous lunatic Ty Veld (yes, stupid name, I know, I know), dyed his hair green. Painfully bright neon green and he was proud of it. Half the office agreed he had species issues. Really, any self-respecting elf wouldn't try and pass off as a sprite, even one as irresponsible as the insane moron who said he couldn't even remember his own rank. Someone told her she and Veld were now working on the Opal case, her partner was nowhere in sight, a pixie rushing round the corner knocked her over and _stepped_ on her and continued on his merry way without stopping to apologize and Foaly was moping over not getting to spend enough time with his girlfriend because of the Opal case and now the Control Centre is wrecked, Foaly wasn't there and she was going to have the blame. So personally, I can't blame her for what she did next.

Captain Holly Short screamed. Loudly and angrily, she let the world know of this injustice. She saw a flash of green in the corner of her eye and sent a straight punch into the oncoming fairy's stomach.

"Ow! I knew you were mad at me for taking a nap when I was supposed to be out on patrol with you but you really didn't have to punch me, ya know!" the sergeant was bent double with a pained look on his face.

Silently fuming, Holly pointed at the destroyed Centre and her partner face faulted. "You did that? Am I dead yet?"

"No and unfortunately no." Holly said dryly, picking her way through the mess. "Call Commander Vinyaya. Foaly's gone."

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"Mister Fowl, sir!" Julian ran into the study panting. "Artemis is missing!"

"I am sure this is one of her elaborate practical jokes. There is no real reason to be alarmed," the blue-eyed adult dismissed it with a wave of an elegant hand.

"She took her collection of manga with her," Julian added.

"Excuse me?" Artemis asked.

"Graphic novels, sir, she wouldn't take them with her if she were playing a prank," Julian said, regaining his breath. "She left a note on her table." He held out the small slip of paper but Artemis had already stood.

"Reading that will not be necessary. Fetch Butler," the pale adult ordered. Julian was bewildered but complied, running out of the Fowl Mansion's study.

Artemis was concerned, to say the least. The tiny fairy population against that insane girl and the things she did? Artemis shook his head. They didn't stand a chance.

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Meanwhile, the said insane girl was sitting in her school uniform talking to a certain pixie.

"Thank you, Miss Koboi, for delivering the package moderately undamaged," the dark-haired girl was trembling with barely suppressed fury. _That wasn't part of the deal!_ An internal voice screamed. _Calm,_ another demanded. _Be professional. The result is all that counts._

_You see, Artemis wasn't cruel by nature, merely ruthless. There was a difference. Ruthless is seeing the bright clear line between A and B and stopping at nothing to follow that beautiful, clear, bright line, wanting to hold onto it, never letting it go._

"I hope you will uphold your end of the deal," Opal replied sweetly.

_The problem is finding and keeping the line..._

"I have my own honor and reasons behind this," Artemis answered Opal's hidden question.

_Not letting anything interfere with the line…_

"No fear, my word is law here. My laws are not broken. We will assist you in regaining your magical powers," Artemis continued.

_And most of all…_

"Nice doing business with you," Opal concluded reluctantly, as if she wished to demand more from the tentative ally sitting across the table with a blank look.

_Following it wherever it led._

"You may leave," Artemis said coolly, tone implying it to be an order.

_Artemis Fowl the Third saw the bright, clear line._

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"What do you mean Foaly's been abducted?" the commander rapped out sharply.

"Well, I don't know. I got there later and that was only because the captain screamed," Veld said sheepishly.

Both females chose to ignore him completely.

"I'm not sure. The Control Centre was practically demolished and Foaly was missing. His things were all there, so it couldn't have been an accident," Holly reported.

Vinyaya nodded, deep in thought. "Any clue as to who it was?"

"We, um, I mean, the captain found a nearly complete fingerprint, moderately clear. So we do have a lead," Veld offered. "But you're not going to like it."

"Shoot."

"Opal Koboi."

"D'Arvit!!"

"That's what I thought you'd say."

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Foaly groaned as he came to. A swift kick to his side effectively shut him up.

"Keep it down," someone hissed warningly. Foaly opened his eyes a slight crack to see an elf. An elf with auburn hair and forest green eyes.

"_Holly?_" Foaly said in disbelief.

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_YM: Review and you can have a cookie! Heck, take two if you do. The jar is on the button that says GO. Be nice to the lonely little button._


	5. Holly or Hunter

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

**_Holly or Hunter?_**

_YM: Greetings! I'm here to say how happy I am for some random reason!_

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"Julian Butler! Are you banging your head against Emi's room door? That's not going to do anything but give you a headache!" Julia called.

"I wasn't banging my head against the _door_!" he protested. "And she would kill you if she heard you called her that," he added. Julia ignored him completely.

"No, you were banging it against her closet. That's not going to open it and you'll lose more brain cells than you can afford," Julia chided.

Julian looked at her as if she was going to eat him. "You're even starting to _talk _like her!"

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"I understand, but why?" Butler asked.

"She didn't skip eight grades for nothing," Artemis said grimly. "She wanted to take on the fairies… I feel the need to add my concern… on the fairies side, of course."

"Are we going back?" Butler asked.

"I'm afraid so, old friend," Artemis replied, shaking his head. He bit his bottom lip. "Do you think we'll be done in time for the concert at-"

"No," Butler replied before Artemis had even finished his sentence. Artemis sighed.

"We'll have to hurry then," he finished, taking out his mobile phone.

"I'm getting too old for this sort of thing anymore," Butler remarked quietly.

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"Bored, nonchalant, blasé, apathetic, fed up, jaded, sick of… oh, this is sad. I'm reduced to being a walking thesaurus for lack of better things to do…" Hunter sighed heavily for the umpteenth time. "Even sitting for the history test again…"

"How about working on that new explosive?" the robot Dragracer buzzed. Hunter dismissed it with a wave of her hand.

"Finished it ages ago… on the day I went with Rachel to the mall…" she sighed.

"The Assassin Barbie from Hell, I remember that now," Dragracer beeped.

"I need to play a game or something…" Hunter moaned.

"There is one in my database but it requires thirteen more people. Do you know thirteen more people?" the droid questioned.

"Of course! Who do you take me for?!" asked Hunter indignantly.

"Thirteen _living_ people?" the robot asked, skeptical.

"Uh…"

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"Be quiet, or I'll get into trouble!" Holly hissed into Foaly's ear.

"Holly? How did you get here? Ow!" Foaly whispered. "Did you just kick me?"

Holly nodded and placed a finger on her lips. Her eyes closed as she strained her ears to hear something. Automatically, Foaly did the same. He could just catch a faint string of words, part of a conversation. He frowned. Where had he heard that voice before? Holly sighed in relief beside him.

"That woman isn't coming in here…good. She's the biggest headache you could ever imagine!" Holly relaxed.

"Who?" asked Foaly.

"The stupid pixie thing…"Holly mumbled.

"So Opal's playing in this game too," Foaly reasoned. "Now, if we could only find out the game master…"

Holly snorted. "I could tell you that. Hunter is the one getting us into this mess."

Foaly's eyes widened. "Hunter…?'

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"Julian, open the gate," Butler called. The teenager stared at them resolutely.

"I'm coming with you," he said firmly, opening a car door.

"We're wasting far more time than I expected, let the boy come, old friend. It might do him good," Artemis decided.

Julian grinned in triumph and Butler just shook his head. This seemed like a lot of trouble to catch a ten-year old girl, even if she was a high school senior…

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"There is no objective yet…other than a challenge, I suppose. Hunter gets bored easily. She threw away a ten thousand piece puzzle two minutes after completing it in an hour. She was euphoric at the thought of fighting the fairies…" Holly recalled, shaking her head in disbelief. Foaly whinnied softly. What a lunatic!

"This doesn't concern you in the least bit? You too, are a fairy…" Foaly realized. He got a kick in the ribs as a reward. Ooh, sensitive subject there. Best tread lightly or his rids would be broken and without the, magic that the other fairy races had, one of the disadvantages of the centaur, he would be handicapped in this mess. That's all the fairy side needed, another disadvantage.

"Holly, is something wrong?" A tall silhouette appeared in the doorway, dark eyes scanning the room. The figure had a rather intimidating presence, dark brown bangs leaving half his face in their shadows.

"No," the elf answered shortly.

"If you say so," the person turned away, footsteps resounding in the seemingly empty corridor outside. Holly, who was not the Holly of the fairies, sighed.

"Do you understand yet? This is a game. The winner takes all," Holly said quietly.

"And the loser dies," Foaly finished.

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_YM: Any ideas? Anyone? I'm suffering a major writer's block so please don't kill me for taking so long to update!_


	6. Caged Bird Tempest

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

**_Caged Bird?-Tempest_**

_YM: Oh, and I HAVE read the Eternity Code. Just to clear things up for you, Julian Butler is NOT Domovoi, he's an OC. In this fic, he's Domovoi's nephew unlucky enough to be assigned Artemis III. Sorry if I wasn't clear enough there._

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"Holly," the same person from before reappeared in the doorway. "The nutcase says to let this one some slack. Don't want to kill him too soon." He remarked in a bored voice.

Holly made a growling animalistic sound. The centaur couldn't believe it. One fruitcake after another! What was it with these people anyway?

"Go away, and if you have spare time, make an effort to keel over and die while you're at it." Holly gritted out, vein pulsing in her temple. The apparent teen tilted his head to the right slightly.

"I _would_ consider it if I wasn't given strict orders to '_stay alive, will you?_' by our resident loony-tune. What a drag," the brunette flicked hair out of his eyes with a sigh. Foaly's jaw just hit rock bottom. What kind of craziness was this? Staying alive was a _drag_?! The brown eyes were just so…so _indifferent_ to everything.

"Well, so long now," he made his exit. Foaly's left eye twitched in disbelief. Did everyone here have a personality or mental issue?

"Nope, just Tempest," Holly said in answer.

"You…you read my mind?!" he stuttered.

"Nope, trust me. That's almost everyone's reaction to our bunch of misfits. For example, 'are you for real?' is a common one," Holly said dully. Foaly's bottom jaw took an express trip to Asia, through the middle of the earth style.

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"So, anyone mind explaining to me what is happening here?" Veld asked as he jogged to keep up. Holly ignored him…again. Commander Vinyaya sighed heavily.

"We're going to see our favorite Irish criminal mastermind," she answered, annoyance apparent in her voice. Veld was certainly trying on one's patience.

"Oh, that sounds so cool!!…… Who is it?"

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Tap…tap…tap…sigh…tap, sigh, tap, tap……_sigh_. This was _boring_. This was worse than the time he was hung outside Juliet's room in a fishnet by the annoying Artemis. Julian sighed again. They had spent the better part of an hour in the stupid car while the little monster that called herself a genius was out probably on rampage. One hand went up to bury itself in his already tousled dark brown hair, probably making it worse than it already was.

"Calm yourself," came a sharp reprieve from his uncle, driving the car. Julian's head jerked up, then he nodded once to show he understood before leaning against the car door. His eyes shut and suddenly, he saw something. It was faint and linear but it was there. _I would … wasn't given … orders to 'stay alive…you?' by … loony-tune. What a drag…_Julian's eyes flew open.

"Uncle! Stop the car!" he shouted. The car jerked to a stop, nearly flinging its occupants out through the windscreen.

"Julian…" Butler started warningly. Which meant, Julian, you had better have a good explanation for this, or else, in Domovoi language. Julian wasn't even half listening.

"We're going the wrong direction!" he said excitedly. "Artemis is the other way!" Now only if he could explain HOW he knew.

Artemis II paused, contemplating this new turn of events. "Follow his directions," he finally decided. Butler hesitated but executed a three-point turn and headed back from where they started. _The Fowl Mansion_.

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"There," Holly whispered, pointing to the speeding car coming on the road to the Fowl Mansion, home to the young genius. Well, he wouldn't be so young now; he would be twenty-seven years old. Humans age so fast that he would be considered a fully-fledged adult at this age.

"What?" her green-haired partner yawned, rubbing the sleepiness out of his eyes. Holy resisted the urge to kick him and took a deep breath.

"Artemis Fowl junior," she breathed, patience long having since worn thin. Veld still appeared confused, or dazed…you could never really tell with someone as insane as him.

"Oh…who's he?" he asked.

"Our trump card."

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"Butler, stop the car," Artemis ordered abruptly. For the second time, they were nearly flung headfirst out of the car. As it was, they skidded a fair distance and the car did a full 360 degree turn.

"Whoa, I'm dizzy," Julian muttered softly in the back seat. Well, he wasn't really in the seat so much as on the floor but, same difference to everyone there.

The tinted window on Artemis' right rolled down smoothly. He leaned out casually and started conversing with a nearby bush.

"Holly, I know you're there. Why don't you stop pretending to be part of the scenery and step on out?" he inquired as if the holly bush was an old friend. Had Artemis finally cracked?

"How did you know?" Holly demanded, emerging from behind the camouflage sheet.

"Simple, really. If a bush that bears berries out of season appears on the road to your home rustling like crazy, and you know that any wildlife here has long been frightened out of its wits and driven away, you know it's not natural. I came to the conclusion it would be fairies because of an event that had happened recently. I knew it would be you, for you have the most experience in dealing with humans, namely Butler and myself," Artemis explained.

"How in the world do you call that simple? I'm still trying to get past the 'simple' remark!" Veld demanded, stepping out of the bush.

"Who's your new friend, Holly?" Butler chuckled. Veld shrank back. That's not a human, that's a giant!

"Sergeant Ty Veld, also known as the Section 8's Number One Hyperactive Species Confused Lunatic," Holly supplied dully. "Also my new partner."

"What are you doing?" Julian asked, getting up from the floorboards. ("That's what you get for not wearing your seatbelt, kid," Butler reprimanded lightly.)

"We have a problem," Holly admitted. "And we need your help."

"Get in the car," Artemis replied, window winding back up. "You can tell me about it on the way to the Mansion."

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"Just like I'm supposed to 'guard' you, Tempest is supposed to be sentry for that exceedingly annoying pixie," Holly said by way of explanation. Foaly decided to risk it.

"You are like someone I know," he started.

"Captain Holly Short of Section 8, right?" Holly finished dully. "I know. I know. I'm like her and Tempest is like the Butler boy."

"Oh, fine. That takes a lot of my shoulders…Wait, Butler? As in the servants of the Fowl family?" Foaly's eyes bugged.

"Yep," came the reply.

"I should have known. When there's humans, fairies and mayhem, the criteria for Artemis Fowl is fulfilled."

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Opal didn't like Tempest from the second they met, which was approximately ten seconds ago. He seemed to have no motivation whatsoever, doing things because they were necessary, not because he wanted to. He seemed to have no emotions and wouldn't fall to any of her manipulation skills. It was scary to meet someone with that much clarity. Maybe that's why Hunter had chosen him to keep an eye on her. How annoying. Opal sighed loudly.

"When do I get out of here?" she asked the multitude of small glass objects on the table.

"Talking to inanimate objects is usually considered a sign of mental instability in majority of social circles," came the quiet comment. Tempest was watching her with his dark eyes, observing every move.

Opal growled something which shouldn't be repeated in front of small children. The brunette sighed.

"If you want to end up in an asylum it's your choice," Tempest decided to leave the crazy pixie to herself.

"Hey, do you know if Foaly's down there?" Opal asked.

"Yes."

"Then let's bring down some food and eat in front of him," Opal snickered.

Tempest's mouth twisted into an evil smirk. "That's just plain _mean_…I like it."

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_YM: Don't you dare say this chapter is too short. death glare I finished it in two days, so there!_


	7. Artemis II

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

_**Artemis II**_

_YM: This chappie…will get a bit boring. I'm going to try and explain things best as I can. Sorry for not updating for so long. School is EVIL to us fanfic authoresses._

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"Very well, Holly. How much do you know?" Artemis sighed, leaning heavily on the chair's backrest. They had returned to the Fowl Mansion on Julian's directions and Artemis was trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. Hunter Quartz was the root of this entire calamity…he just knew it. Now, if only he could prove it quite so easily.

"Next to nothing," Holly replied earnestly, ignoring the back ground argument between the Butler boy and her insane partner about some TV show. "Opal got out of jail a while back. Foaly went missing yesterday and we found Opal Koboi's fingerprint in his office. That's about all." Holly shrugged hopelessly.

Artemis raised an eyebrow. "Really? That's limiting information to the extremities, not much to go on…I expected better of the People," he finished.

"Keep going on like that and I'll smack you," Holly warned. Artemis laughed, albeit grimly.

"Fine, I'll tell you what I know…"

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"Do you remember the time we went through the Time Tunnel together with No1 and the other demons?" Artemis asked. Holly nodded.

"We swapped eyes," she recalled. "And before that, your middle and second finger swapped when another demon dragged you through."

"Correct. When we returned, it was three years later from when we left. I had twin brothers," Artemis continued.

"Why are you telling it to me all over again? I was there, remember?" Holly stated with a tinge of annoyance.

"Exactly!" Artemis said, as if trying to prove a point. "Butler doesn't remember it. The twins are nonexistent. Our eyes and my fingers have reverted back to normal. I checked a map and certain history texts. It's just as if we had never gone through the Tunnel! No, it's as if the demons had never left this world."

Holly's mouth opened in shock of this discovery. "But we remember!" she protested.

"We were in the Tunnel," Artemis explained painstakingly. "Therefore effects of dimensions would be negated by the magic."

"Hey, hey, if you're saying what I think your saying, then you're saying that there's something that can mess with us as if we're nothing!" Veld interjected. Julian nodded.

"Yes, if you wish to put it in layman's terms, there is a creature that controls the flow and consequences of time, space and happenings, or what I will refer to as key incidents. These incidents are usually triggers for later happenings, such as wars or even natural disasters," Artemis said.

"But, then Artemis…" Butler stopped. Artemis did not want Hunter found out just yet.

"I believe one such key incident would be Butler picking up a flyer referring to a children's art exhibition, an exhibition that had pieces of the People in life-striking realism. And somehow, all general points were correct, such as sprites being green and the rest not having wings. The artist was a young girl, brilliant but she appeared to have a personal grudge against the world," Artemis went on, as if Butler had not uttered a word.

Holly and Veld nodded, wondering what he was trying to get at. Julian had a strange look on his face, though, as if thinking the worst comes soon.

"She did not exist in the data files of any country and her family line was almost unheard of," the criminal mastermind turned to his bodyguard for a moment.

"Butler, please close the window and turn up the heat. It's positively algid in here," Artemis sidetracked abruptly.

"But Mister Artemis, sir, the temperature reading is 28 degrees Celsius. Are you sure?" Julian asked.

"Don't fret, Julian. It's just pest control," Butler explained, walking over to the windows. "Get the heat controls."

"35 degrees over 10 minutes should be sufficient," Artemis calculated before turning back to the two fairies that looked at him expectantly.

"I did find a site after tedious searching. It required a code that I failed to traverse. I was exasperated, to say the least. I hit the keyboard and a single digit was entered in the code box. It was correct," Artemis recounted.

"That's a convenient coincidence," Holly said darkly.

"You think the same person was messing with it?" Veld asked.

"Holly, you ought to know that there is no such thing as a coincidence, much less a convenient one. I have reason to believe this is yet another key incident," Artemis corrected mildly. "Although it might have been "meddled" with, a key incident is a key incident. From this, I confirmed both that a being of this magnitude prevails. It is unsettling," he admitted.

"What about the girl?" Holly pressed.

"Let's wait for our final guest. I abhor redundant repetition," Artemis replied, leaning into the backrest of the chair. "Julian, open the door and escort him here. The heat should have gotten him out of the ventilation system. Be prepared for a shock. Then turn the heat down. It is the trailing end of summer," he instructed.

Julian muttered something under his breath before leaving the room. A few seconds later, Julian brought a certain familiar dwarf in.

"Mulch?" Holly gaped.

Said kleptomaniac scowled at the blue-eyed prodigy in the armchair. Artemis nodded, looking every bit like a villain.

"How did you know?" Mulch asked.

"I recently had reinforced steel plates installed beneath the house and I don't believe you know there are sensors in the smallest cracks ever since she moved in," Artemis sighed.

"She?" Holly prompted. Artemis sighed.

"Yes, Holly. She is Hunter Quartz, the girl whom I spoke of earlier," Artemis said, eyes closed, as if remembering something.

"So, what does this girl have to do with it?" Veld asked.

"Hunter Quartz is a likely suspect for the happenings in Haven. She is also known as Artemis Fowl the Third, my adopted daughter."

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_YM: Thank you for reading my random nonsense. Thank you even more if you review! I'm sorry again for not updating. To my classmates and previous classmates but still good friends- REVIEW, or no swiss chocolates for you._


	8. Crossroad Puzzles

_**Artemis Fowl the Third**_

_**Crossroad puzzles**_

_YM: Sorry again for the long wait. This chapter is longer to make up for it. (If it's any excuse, my com was throwing a tantrum. It wouldn't let me open Microsoft Word.) I'm so sad… I'm growing old…thirteen …sigh. I'll go cry while you read. Oh, and this chapter is dedicated to Kurasaa Yuki, a friend of mine. Also known as Virid-kun, Moyashi-sama, Allen-chan, ect. Who had BETTER NOT CHANGE HER NAME._

Language notes:

Ara—_. Similar to 'oh', 'ah', 'huh' ect._

Ja ne—_ 'See you'._

-san – _Japanese honorific. Equivalent of Mister/Miss, ect._

-sama – _Japanese honorific. Equivalent of Master, Lord, Lady, ect._

_Thank you. Please read on._

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"She is bent on the downfall of magic for a reason which is likely to be she was **bored**. Or, at least, that is the feeble excuse she will offer." Artemis shook his head gravely.

Somewhere behind him, Julian scoffed, apparently recovered from the shock of seeing a hairy short creature walk through the Fowl Mansion door as if he owned the place. His uncle leaned down and whispered something which made Julian go wide-eyed and rush out of the room.

"Where-" Veld asked half-way, following Julian out of the room with his eyes. Artemis shook his head slightly. More important matters were at hand.

"Hunter Quartz is eccentric, to say the least, and rather violent. If she is not attended to immediately, Haven could be devastated."

"Artemis-san, you underestimate Hunter-sama. That is not wise," a silken voice purred. Julian was leaning against the door frame, Butler's Sig Saur pointed not very discreetly at his head.

Veld balked. "Dude! He's related to you and you point a gun at him for no reason?!"

Artemis raised an eyebrow. How_ did_ sergeant Veld get into Section 8 anyway? By accident? Artemis didn't think that Section 8 was so willing to throw money away.

WHACK! The green haired elf went down and his partner was standing over him, 90cm frame shaking with fury. Holly was practically vibrating hard enough to be shielding.

"He's not Julian," Butler growled under his breath.

"Damn straight he's not!" A furious double shouted from the window, panting.

The fake Julian looked uninterested. "I'm just here to deliver a message. Kill the mastermind, not the messenger," he sighed.

"Is that your message?" Artemis inquired politely. The fake laughed.

"No way. Here's the message: Greetings, Father, Julian, Butler and any random people who might be suicidal enough to challenge me. I am bored, to be direct. Please come and interfere in my plans or I'm going to take over Haven without any resistance and where is the fun in that? Tempest will bring you to the starting point or you could just come here yourself. Either way is equally challenging, so it doesn't matter. I wish you lots of love, randomness and insanity, Hunter Quartz." The clone finished.

"So you must be the 'Tempest' mentioned in the message," Holly said seriously. Tempest smiled.

"Oh, and you should know, that," he pointed at Mulch, "is a fake as well. It'll disintegrate shortly so don't pay it any mind. It was a mild distraction. I suppose Artemis-san already knew, so this doesn't make much difference."

Artemis closed his eyes and nodded.

"Artemis-san, you let our puppet in. Why? Not that it matters…Hunter-sama wants to know."

"She's sufficiently intelligent to come up with a hypothesis," Artemis declined.

"Artemis-san was fishing," the clone relayed.

Veld looked up from the floor, where Holly's boot was keeping him pinned down. "Fishing?"

"Your lead was the puppet. The real dwarf is still in Haven now, stealing something off a poor unsuspecting fairy. Rather obvious." Tempest pointed out not very kindly.

"Then what's stopping us from taking you hostage here and now?" Julian demanded. Butler nodded agreement as Holly let her insane partner up to fight. Artemis met the clone's eyes.

"I could knock you into next week without breaking a sweat," Tempest replied coldly, returning Artemis' gaze without hesitation.

There was no mercy to be shown to either side.

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"What's taking him so long?" Hunter paced the expensive interior of her control room. Digital screens of every size and type adorned the walls, showing various locations or information. There was also a large one for latest manga and anime releases that was kept on 24/7. It was probably the most cheerful thing in the room, because Hunter was far from cheery right now.

Actually, judging by the curses pouring out of her mouth at 160 miles per hour, in various languages, she was the complete opposite of cheery. Tempest was late.

Hunter Quartz did not like to wait. Hated it, to be truthful. She didn't like making others wait _nearly_ _as much_ but still, better them than her.

A screen crackled and Tempest's face came into view, although the picture was fuzzy.

"TEMPEST!" Hunter yowled. "You're LATE!"

The expression on his face turned to confusion. "It's 11:02. No big deal."

"_No big deal_? I _waited_ for you for _2 whole minutes_! 120 elephants! How can it not be a big deal?!"

Tempest sighed and muttered something that sounded like 'troublesome' under his breath.

"Anyway, reporting in. We had a little fight and they were better than I thought, especially the little one that looks like Holly. She damaged the camera and I spent the last 5 minutes getting it to work again. All are unconscious save for Artemis-san. Shall we start negotiations?"

"No. Negotiations are over. Get them to the starting point, whether they like it or not."

"Is that all?"

"Ara? You want more work? That's surprising."

"More work? Not a chance. I'm a lazy guy. If that's everything, I'm out," Tempest finished.

"Well, Artemis-san. Looks like all of you will end up at the beginning like it or not. Sadly, it's my job to get you all there so if you don't make a fuss, I would appreciate it," he sighed, keeping the gadget.

"That was our objective anyway. It was just too unfortunate that two of our numbers are rash," Artemis informed the clone, still on the armchair.

"Thank the Founders," the clone sighed and went round to gathering the unconscious bodies. Artemis closed his eyes. He hadn't done something this insane for years.

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Opal hit the 'wall' with her fist. She couldn't believe that _jerk_ dared to trap her here. It's not like she hadn't been here before, though. Hunter had used this to get her into the Section 8 control room.

It was a dimension storage warp, or as they called it, white space; courtesy of evil mastermind genius, of course. Hunter invented it and the tall spiky haired freak either had usage approved or used it anyway. Opal had a feeling it was the first. She hadn't exactly left a glowing impression on the girl at their last meeting.

What was she doing working with that nut job anyway? Well, Hunter was undeniably strong, mentally and physically. They had roughly the same agenda and enemy. However, there was something that Opal felt very strange about. Hunter, with unlimited resources regarding Haven, did not need Opal around. _And_ Hunter certainly didn't need to help her restore her magic. Why was the girl bothering?

This was all slightly disturbing. Your volatile ally has hidden agendas which could possibly concern something detrimental to you. Naturally you would worry.

Opal sat down to think again. There is nothing much to do in this blank space anyway.

Who is Hunter Quartz, and what did she want?

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"Where am I?" Julian groaned. Something was poking him. He opened his eyes and saw a mirror. He closed his eyes and turned a bit. "I'll sleep for a bit more."

Then he was sent flying.

Now he was definitely awake. Unhappy and awake. "What was that for!" he screamed at his clone. There never had been a mirror. He should have noticed a mirror wouldn't have been wearing different clothes from him.

Tempest smiled. "You're the last one awake," he chirped with sadistic cheer, like he knew that waking up is the bane of the Butler's life. He probably did, if Artemis III was involved.

Well, of course she would know. She's the reason why he had come to despise waking up, but that wasn't a story he liked to share. Suffice to say it involved blackmail material and a certain upset anime obsessed freak.

"Anyway, we are in 'linked white space' now, the starting point to Hunter-sama's trail. Everything you need should be here. Do not, I repeat, NOT under any circumstance damage any manga. She'll have your head. Ja ne!" The clone held up a little white box and disappeared.

"Come back here!" Julian screamed at the spot Tempest just disappeared from. Butlers hand touched his shoulder lightly.

"Shouting at a wall is unprofessional. You know _her_ best. We need you," the heavily built man said, looking at the place where the clone had disappeared.

"Yes," Julian muttered, staring at his boots. Artemis III, or Hunter as she was known as now, had bought them for him and forced him to wear them. They were quite comfortable and it had become a habit to wear them everyday. Of course, since she was obsessed, they were exact replicas to something she had seen in some show or the other.

"There's a lock on the 'door'," Holly informed them after inspecting what looked like the only way out for those who didn't have a little white box that made you go 'poof'. It was basically a rectangle drawn in the wall.

"Nine characters," she added after pressing a few random buttons.

Julian sighed and picked up one of the many volumes of manga stacked neatly in the 'white space'. "We'd better start reading."

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"I'm back," Tempest called. He was basically ignored by everyone except the machine on Hunter's table. Dragracer whirred mechanically and its eyes flashed.

"Welcome back. Opal is waiting in 'white space' for you. She was quite upset."

"Hm? Why?"

"Because you locked her in," the machine stated simply.

"Ara, that's right. I did," the clone remembered. "Anyway, I passed the cube to Holly so it's not my problem. At least, not anymore. I was assigned to play with that group so I'm just taking a short break, since they have over a thousand volumes to go through."

Hunter was apparently listening to the conversation. "You shouldn't underestimate them like that, Tempest. Artemis is a genius and Julian's been around long enough to understand the tiny hints left around."

Tempest nodded in acknowledgement. "True. My base couldn't have been an idiot, could he?"

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"I'm tired of reading this stuffff…" Veld whined. Holly kicked him without looking.

"You're getting beaten by a human," she said, flipping a page. Veld looked around. Artemis was on his sixty-something volume. Butler was on his thirty-fifth. Holly herself was on her fiftieth and he was on… well… his second.

"Look at the Butler boy," she hinted. Julian was on his hundred and eighty-fourth book, which happened to be some vampire saga's volume 3. Veld stared.

"Woah. Anyway, I'm just going to take a break then get back to it," he smiled. A fist was about to connect with his face when Julian spoke.

"Just a question, but has anyone seen this page before?" He asked, lifting up the volume 3 while starting on volume 4. The book was passed round.

"Hunter bought this off EBay or some anime convention. It's hard to forget, or miss," Butler said after staring at the book for some time. He pointed at a panel of someone's shoes.

"Come to think about it, you're right," Julian murmured.

"You're wearing them now," Artemis pointed out, skimming through yet another vampire saga. Surprising how many of the books were related to vampires.

"Veld, you're not doing anything, right?" Julian decided. Veld froze with a sheepish smile.

"Busted," he grinned. He was ignored.

"Search this volume for nine-letter words," Julian ordered tossing the book towards the elf. "Write them down. All of them. I don't care how many times they're repeated. _NO GRUMBLING!_" He added the last part as Veld opened his mouth to argue.

"You sounded exactly like Hunter for a while," Butler commented with a smile.

"Shut up!" Julian screamed. He was in denial and he knew it.

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"Squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" The evil mastermind squealed the classic fangirl style. "So cool! So cool! So cool so cool so cool socool socool socoolcoolcool!!!!!"

When you heard something similar to that, it means she's watching some anime and probably going crazy over the 'bad guy'.

This also means it is NOT SAFE to go within a five-meter radius.

"AGIIIITO! I LOVE YOU!!!!!"

She doesn't sound like someone about to rampage the fairy city hidden deep underground. Actually, she sounded more like a rabid fangirl at a concert of her favourite band.

But then, she's a genius. She can do what she likes.

These were the thoughts of the 'bad' Holly which works for Hunter. She was standing round the corner, waiting for a safe opening to talk to Hunter. This opening was generally the start of the closing theme.

"What show this time?" Holly asked politely.

"Air Gear," Hunter replied, eyes sparkling.

"I was told to report this for that tall idiot. He said: They made it past the first gate, or will shortly. It sucks. I'm waiting for them and orders. This is annoying so hurry," Holly rattled off dutifully.

"The Game begins," Hunter murmured, twirling a lock of long black hair with a finger.

"I also wanted to ask you something. What do we do with Opal?" The elf asked.

"That thing?" Hunter raised an eyebrow. "When it outlives its use or causes more trouble than it's worth, we'll get rid of it. It'll do no harm in white space."

"She outsmarted Artemis the Second before," Holly reminded her.

Hunter laughed it off."If a half-horse can outwit her, I should think myself more than capable of doing so. After all, I'm far from human."

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_YM: Da da da dun… Yes! Another cliffhanger. While I'm at it, the vampire saga Julian was reading is Trinity Blood, while the one with Artemis is Vampire Knight. Please review. I feel more inclined to write when people review. It's a guilt complex thing. The button is a little bit down and to the left. Thank you!_


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